You are currently browsing the monthly archive for November 2008.
woke up @ 3pm this afternoon & i totally felt refreshed . its been long since i last had a good long sleep . last few days were like living in hell , seriously . it’s probably the darkest point of my life . i did silly things that i know i shouldnt do & im glad i have step out of it . not fully but at least it’s a good start . ive been through alot this year , lost a few & gain a few . got stabbed , being made used and got hurt badly . ive learn how to make decision wisely , treasure those who loves me & learn to accept things in a hard way . just because i never plan for my future properly , i quitted school on impulse for my dream & came to realise , i am not ready to lead that new life but thank god , i found my way and i know what to do in the next following year & of course , i have to be stern to the decision i made . i thought by giving in and to do whatever you can for a friend is a form of showing how much you treasure this friendship and your love for them but it seems like people tends to take things for granted . i thought by forgiving a person and giving them a chance , things could really start afresh but yes , things still remain the same . everything backfired on me & i got fooled and hurt badly , so much for being soft hearted and forgiving .
i know i am not perfect and everyone makes mistake , that’s why i am willing to forgive and forget no matter how bad you treated me in the past. you can make a complete fool out of me , you can say whatever you want to others , you can bring me down for all you want . i can tolerate your nonsense as long as i can but please know your limit . just because i remain in silence and never do anything back to you dosent mean im afraid of you . it’s because i still regard you as my friend and i dont want to make things ugly . afterall , i dont think i am a very nice person to mess with .
i realised that this world is so scary & cruel , this real world . as i grow older , i encounter all different sets of problem . my love one can turn their back on me overnight and leave just like this over something in their life . some stab me just to get what they want . this is how ungrateful people can be despite of all the things you had done for them & i wonder how many more will there be to come . but on the other hand , i dont hate them , i seriously dont . in fact i should thank them cause this is where i learn and open up my eyes to see people clearly & it’s not easy for one to get together with the other one out of so many to share your laughter , pain and tear . afterall , these people were there for you once and left you with good memories .
i am not a person who is good in expressing myself and often got mistaken for being heartless & cold & not appreciate things for what they had done for me but deep down , i really appreciate alot for what others had done for me , be it friends / lover .
i can be the most childish bitch on earth & said fucking nasty words to you when i am angry but at the end of the day , i actually dont mean what i said .
& i want to say thank you to those who were there for me & let me know that i am not alone .
love you !
you told me that this lyrics is written for me , i dont know if its true but .. i was touched ..
now , i dedicate this song back to you .
Was it all just lies,
words thats just slipped out,
without you realising,
but baby did you know,
how much hope you’ve gave me,
the love i was long deprived,
i thought you were the one.
but why, did you have to break it,
when i was drowned,
in your perfect love,
but now i know,
everything was just false hopes,
lies, mistakes and sins,
and that night,
holding each other close,
never meant anything to you.
baby, did you know how my heart,
rip itself apart,
when you said i wasn’t the one,
everthing just happened,
and its was all just a mistake.
i know it wont work out anymore,
but baby, it aint easy,
to see this perfect love fade away,
how you hold me with your loving arms,
kiss me with your tender lips that night,
but now, its all just an overnight sensation.
And baby,
maybe, i just took things too seriously,
‘Cause everything was nothing to you..
POST DELETED .
everything in th post was out of my anger..
missing & loving someone deeply could turn into a pain .
pain in your heart , your mind & your body .
this picture will be perfect if sugar is inside .
imy too , sugar .
***
hello wordpress , youre like a complete stranger to me .
edited th header . all i could say is , wordpress rlly have limited layouts & i cant even customise my own layout , which is rlly bad . the only benefit is that i can lock my post & this is also the main reason why i switched to WP. i can pin down my personal thoughts & feelings over certain issues in the future , 3 cheers for that ! hip hip hooray ! pretty much have a strong feeling that i’ll be switching back to blogger but on th other hand , i guess i should try adapting blogging in a new environment , like how i am trying to live my life w/o _ .
it’s 6am right now & i couldnt get to sleep . i tried to , 2 hours ago . but i ended up crying & led me having a very terrible blocked nose . initial plan was to meet C later in th morning for a jog @ woodlands stadium , go back home & take a rest & had dinner w him at night but i dont think i want to follow th plan . i dont know . i guess i have to text him later . feeling pretty bad though but i just want to stay at home for this week . or maybe for a few days , to be alone , to stay in my room . or would it be even worst to be… alone ? …
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